Being Sorry

Being sorry can be very hard when we're overwhelmed with pride,
But sometimes our pride must take a fall before we lose out,
And when we have to say sorry we should mean it from our soul, A meaningless sorry is like a broken promise to the heart.
And it only hurts more in the end, bringing bitter resentment,And leading to the loss of a love that should be eternal, Bringing us back down to earth from the fairytale world of our mind, With a pain that is maddening, physical and sometimes critical.

My heart is weeping tears of blood for the pain that I've caused you, And it's crying out my apologies to your mind,
Pleading for your forgiveness for my unfortunate outbursts,
I never meant, in a million years, to be so unkind.
I have made mistakes in the past but never as serious as this,
And I know I will only have myself to blame if you leave,
And that scares me more than I've ever been scared in my life,
For you're my true motivation, the only real thing in which I believe.

Everything else is just a fantasy to my egotistical ideals,
It's always been me, me, me for far too long,
And lately I haven't given even a passing thought to your concerns,
I let them all fly past me, but now I know I was wrong.
You were reaching out to me in your time of uncertainty and sorrow, While all I cared about was me and what was mine,
And as I watch you pack your bags with tears streaming down my cheeks, Too late, I feel all your angst and pain.

And all that's left for me to do is say sorry in a sincere way,
With an apology that comes from deep inside my soul,
It's all I have left to offer for your love and your loyalty,
It's just a pity that my own loyalty, I couldn't hold.
Now all I have left of you are the memories of the goodness I have lost, And that loss brings a sadness every time I think of your name, And my heart yearns to be able to turn back the hands of time, To correct the mistakes I've made and start again.

So please take time to think about what I've said, as it comes from the heart, Take time and try to forgive me my failure to deliver,
And if you can't, then cast me out of your life never to return,
And I will hang my head in shame....... forever.

Under the Tree

You left me alone, I didn’t cry,
I didn’t call you didn’t try.
Out of all the things I chose you,
I said I love you I really do.
But now that you are with him,
I don’t know why I really care.
I tried to get over you,
But I realized that my love is true.
I did all I could to forget,
But I couldn’t do it you bet.
I waited for you on cold nights,
And watched over you from great heights.
Now that you have forgotten me,
I always stand under the tree.
Waiting for you to hold me tight,
And then I see you with him at night.
Finally you start coming to the tree,
just to say, ..!!!
you never loved me.!!!!

do you still ... care?

My thoughts of you are in my soul
my heart aches for your love
my heart would skip a beat
just for a minute with you
I love you
always and forever
the days without you are cold
sad and dark
with you out of my life
life can’t get any worse
we were meant to be
but maybe it was only me
today life is a blur
a day of sorrow
I’m missing you 
Don’t you understand 
without you
is not where I want to be
don’t you see I’m here
can’t you just be here?
Don’t you care anymore?
without you life really isn’t there
do you still care?
or have you fallen
because I am tired of bawling
do you still ... care?

friendship Never dies

I feel I've lost a thousand years,
just living day by day,
I'm hidden behind the pain and tears,
my sorrow guides the way,
I cannot see where I have gone,
nor where my life shall go,
but leaving you my life long friend is the only way I know,
it will be painful, I will be weak,
but true friendship never dies, 
so call upon the greatest power,
when you feel you can't survive,
She will hear you saddest hours,
and keep our memories alive,
for in the eternal love of god,
True friendship Never dies.

I follow my dreams

I get laughed at, 
I get ignored,
I often feel trapped,
and keep my thoughts stored.
People can be cruel and very mean,
but no matter what, 
I follow my dreams
Life has waves,
I know that.
But I stand brave,
and just take the crap.
I may feel exhausted and totally creamed,
but no matter what,
I follow my dreams.
I know what I want,
and I won't stop trying.
Quitting? I can't,
for now I'm flying.
It's impossible, it seems,
but no matter what,
I follow my dreams..

A thing for Joy..

I know we never had our first date
things were difficult but we still stayed up late
talking about what we wanted to be
I wanted you, I thought you wanted me
I loved the way ... you styled the hair in your facethe way your lips got its shape
Friends come and go, sometimes they stay
Enemies have hurt us, is it a price we pay
Do they ache, like we do
are you grieving, like I do for you
I hoped, 
I wished
I loved, 
I missed
you held, 
you cared
you hugged 
you kissed
I hate the way you moved on, but only because I want the same
but that's so hard to do now, When I have no one to blame.

Scared

I'm scared of not missing you anymore, I'm scared to live that day.
I'm scared my mind will erase the memory of the day you went away.
I put a lot of trust in you, you said that you were different.
Your intellect was beyond the hood, but I guess not far enough to miss it.
I guess I should've told you that I'm really sensitive, though I try to act like I don't mind, that night I still relive.
I'm ashamed because I know I love you way more than you like me, 
and that I cry for you when you're not here so much that I can't see.
This headache just won't go away its been here since you left.
Though loud yet meek, though screaming yet bleak, this loss truly feels like death.
I pray you don't feel these words are a stretch because we've shared limited time, 
or that I'm completely insane for tatting your name, assuring I've lost my mind.
Well the truth is that you are not for me, and I've known it since we met.
Yeah we fought, loved, broken up, but there's something you just have to get.
I don't want anyone else, I don't want another woman.
I'll build you up and give you my heart to cradle in your hand.
I admit I am attached, and dangerously its true.
That I want to offer my body and soul as a sacrifice to you.
I pray you never leave my side though physical I can take, 
but mentally please stay awhile and never leave this place.
That waiting is indeed the hardest game and I've just succumbed to defeat.
Though unspoken yet chanted, and rough yet romantic, this love was written in the stars.
I don't know what you feel inside, or if this load you can carry.
If once you're out you'll go buck wild or settle down and marry.
I feel we'll be getting to know each other more so here than before, 
so open and let me in because it's you that I adore.
The fate of this relationship is exclusively up to you, ill be holding down my end until my biggest dream comes true

Why it has to be you?

Sitting alone and silently

I recall a special part of my life

That part came unexpectedly

And lasted only for a while.

My life has been quite and peaceful

Until that unforgettable moment

You came like a silhouette of my soul

Then you walked right through my heart.

Everyday was a picture of happiness

There's no hint of loneliness

Everything was wonderful

Because I spent it with you.

But then, as time goes by

Feelings begin to fade away

Tears fall down one by one everyday

And it kills me to say goodbye.

Every time my mind says move on

my heart says hold on

So many questions inside my head

But the answers are all up to you.

Loving someone like you

Without boundaries

Makes me think deeply again,

Why, Why it has to be you?

Losing you .. no more

used to listen, when you said you would always be there.
I sit and think about all the times we had together, and how I thought I used to love you, when you used to care.
I'd last through any weather. but when the our storm came you left at the first sight of rain, leaving me here
to deal with all this pain.
I sat there crying thinking what did I do wrong, I looked to my kids whom said (daddy stay strong).
so I wiped my tears and begin a new, new me, new life, and happiness without you.
someday you'll miss me, but it will be to late for us to be.
you didn't know what you were missing but now you do, calling me crying saying daddy I love you.
I love you too that's why I'm letting you go, I'm a hell of a good man it's too bad it took you this long to know.
what we had is in the past, it's a reason we didn't last.
but whenever you get discouraged about why we're through, just look in the mirror
because it's all on you...
I hope next time you learn from your mistakes, and when that man needs you do what ever it takes.
always remember this I love you but I love me more, I had to learn that when you walked out the door.

Echo In The Wind

We were once the youngest of toddlers
Playing recklessly without concern 
But how the tides have changed
What I had is now what I yearn
We were the best of friends
I loved her to no end
But as the days passed by 
It was getting harder and harder to pretend
The truth was I was in love
With the plaid girl next door
Our friendship was unique
But it grew to be much more
We dated for a few
It was the happiest years of my life
We gave everything to each other
And he even asked for me to be her husband
You see, it was everything I wanted
But she was meant for so much more 
I wanted her all to myself
But she had so much more to explore
She was a special Woman
She stood out from all the rest
She was so selfless at times
And that’s why she was truly the best
This woman had a destiny to fulfill
And I was only standing in her way
She said he would do anything for me
But I couldn’t possibly ask her to stay
The day came when she left my side
It was a cold and gloomy night
I still remember that day so clearly
I held onto her with all my might
It was the last I’ve ever saw of her
The last study of her face
But it doesn’t really matter because the
Memories is not something I can erase
My heart bruises easily
As I sit alone late at night
But I often reassure myself
Because I know that I’ll be alright 
Nothing has really changed
Nothing that I can see
Even though she’s not here right now
I still feel her presence next to me
The story of our love
Is an endless story never to be lost
I don’t know if I will ever see her again
But I always keep my fingers crossed
My heart is slowly adjusting
To continue life without that charmer
But I know that I will not be in this alone because
She will always be my knight in shining armor