Nothing

You say it's nothing 
But this isn't nothing 
Your actions tell me your done
But in my heart you are not gone
I'm trying so hard to let go
I wish I could let you know 
I'm not ready to say goodbye 
But I can't stand hearing you lie
What do you want me to say to you
That I'm in love with you?
What good would that do?
I'm nothing to you

How i love you "Arabic Poem"

الشوق يجري في دمي ... وكذا الحنين

والليل أسدل خيطه .. وأطل .. ليل حزين

وطيف خيالك أمسى يداعب مهجتي 

وأنا شارد البال ...  أتعبني الأنين

وليل طويل أرقني .. وأعياني السهر

وفؤادي يخفق تارة .... وتارة يستكين

والحب ليل وسهر وأشواق ولوعة

إذا حل بعاشق ... يظهر عليه .. ويستبين

Pain .. is not an emotion

Pain is not an emotion I know

Yet it's all I know 

I can't feel it

Nor can I heal it

It happens all the time

For me, it's all I know

I've experienced first hand a fathers abuse

Yeah, sometimes it hurt

But I grew numb to the pain

I've witness my mother cry

And every time I wanted to die

That's all in the past now

But the memories still last

This may be hard to believe

For a girl whose just sixteen

But when I think the memories have left me

They come back to haunt me

You may find it hard to believe

But sometimes late at night I cry 

Until I feel dead inside

So don't think I don't know pain

Because pain is all I've know.

different mind

Two people in pain,
But in two different kinds--
He cries for her;
But she's of a different mind.
He's the product of her pain,
In many different ways--
The one thing she wants
Is never to be blamed.
Circumstances happen,
And salt is added to his wound;
She cannot console him, 
and feels their friendship will end soon.
So She sits back and watches,
And cries her silent tears for him--
On the outside she is cold
But inside she cries with him.
And later he will throw up to her,
The coldness she has shown
And she will sit as always,
afraid to be alone.

Why !!

.. live when it's easier to die !!
.. smile when it's easier to cry !!
.. try to pass when all you do is fail!!
.. feel pain when you can make it go away !!
.. love when love is full of doubt !!
.. can't anyone tell me what life's about In spite of all I know that I want to live But !!
.. do I feel I have nothing left to give. !!

Escape

Trees, trees, trees, Branches, sticks, leaves
Whipping, gashing, slashing at my arms
I can't get away no matter how fast I run
Tripping, falling, crawling on the floor,
Ragged cuts, tattered clothes, jagged breathing as I start to slow
My eyes are heavy, my vision blurred, Distant images start to stir
She's right behind me, she's catching up
I have to keep moving but my legs have had enough
Getting dizzy about to pass out, a distant figure starts to stand out
A distant scream, a whispered plea, I can't believe it came from me
Pulse is racing, a feeling of hands, a gentle hush as I'm helped to stand
It's her, she's caught me, please strength don't leave me yet
Let me be anything but her sullied pet
I have to leave, I have to get away, I fall to my knees and let my head sway
Stopping she stares at me and gives a mirrored laugh
Then she reaches for me as I start to move back
I'm to slow, she's to fast, I can't get away, she's taking me back
I can't let this happen, I must react
Heads to fuzzy, I'm getting to weak, I'm stumbling over my own feet
One chance, a pull, a twist, a pop and a moan, I'm not the one with a broken bone
I'm still running, she's still coming
My strength's about to give out
Dead end, cliffs end, water and rocks below
Tell me, if you had a choice which way would you go?

State of Mind

Depression is a state of mind

but remember my dear

it is a crime

to cut the throat of a beloved soul

and suck the life from within the hole

cross out the lies that left your lips

and drink the blood with thirsty sips

snap her bones into shattered glass

hold your breath until the screaming pass

shout her name from miles away

he doesn't move he doesn't stay.

Rip the wound with foolish tears

and cover the scar with dreaded fears

taste the pain on your own bandaged tongue

and drip the tears into her precious lungs

shoot the smile from her face

and bring her to a forbidden place

screaming, she runs away

he doesn't move he doesn't stay.

All i want is .. to be with you

You came to me .. in that hour of need,

When i was so lost .. So lonely

You came to me .. took my breath away

Showed me the right way,

The way to lead

you filled my heart with love

Showed me the light above

now all i want

is .. to be with you

You are my one true love

taught me to never judge

now all i want

is .. to be with you

You came to me .. in a time of despair,

i called on you, you were there

Without you what would my life mean?

to not know the unseen, the worlds between

for you i'd sacrifice

for you i'd give my eyes

Anything, Just .. to be with you

i feel so lost at times,

by all the hurt and lies

now all i want

is .. to be with you

Showed right from wrong

Taught me to be strong

Need you more than ever

you came to me .. in that hour of need

need you more than ever

you filled my heart with love

Showed me the light above

now all i want

is .. to be with you

judging silently

Every single drop of my tear is costly than anything in this World. But, No one knows its real value until they have it in their own eyes. I keep saying; Everything is gonna be alright even I’m dying inside !! but If our world is really easy and beautiful; nobody would have entered it by crying !! by a way or another i realize that; The worst regret is not for the things i did wrong but for the countless right things i did for the wrong people!!
I thought my heart was dead forever
But now its beating even faster than ever.
I am very proud of my heart.
It is been played, cheated, stabbed, burned and even broken.
but somehow it is still functioning for me! So please ..
If you don’t know then ask me, I may answer.
If you don’t agree then argue with me. I may missing something.
If you don’t like then say it to me, I may change.
If you don’t feel well then let me know, I may help.
BUT
Please don’t start judging my tears silently !!

No matter

No matter how hard I cry, the sadness still grows

No matter how many friends I have, I still feel lonely

No matter how many people love me, I still feel empty

No matter how loud I laugh, I’m still not happy

because

I just need you to love me then; all my pain will go

Dreams

I dream of laying on a blanket under the stars
I dream of you holding me tightly as we dance
I dream of you looking in my eyes as you say you love me
I dream of our first night in our own house
I dream of our first fight
I dream of our first make up kiss
I dream of spending the rest of my life with you.

The Journey

For so long I held my heart so securely in place
Away from the world, in this cold, dark, lonely space
Then you came into my life, and I didn't know what to do
What my heart had so longingly missed, I now found in you
Letting you in my life was something I wasn't sure about
But the more time we spent together I was left without a doubt
Knowing that with each passing day, your love to me meant more
It filled a place inside my heart that had known only emptiness before
I didn't see how painful it must have been for you to love me, unconditionally
When I demanded so much of you, this perfect person you tried so hard to be
Even though it wasn't purposeful I know it hurt your heart to believe
That just one mistake, and I wouldn't hesitate to leave
How could you have known nothing was ever farther from being true
Your smile, the warmth of your heart, I could never bid adieu
As you held my heart you touched a part of my soul, and there your fingerprints still rest
Your whispers softly echo, with hopes of hearing them I quiet my very breath
Although where we're headed now is something yet unknown,
A part of me has left, and never again will I alone, my heart own
And how fortunate I must be, that at this journey's end
It has been, still is, and always will be, you I call best friend

Honour Of Love

People find shame in it,

They deny it,

They spit on it,

They step all over it,

But in my eyes,

To be obsessed,

Is to be in love,

How can a man deny such an honor?

For most do not love,

They might care,

They might adore,

But they will never know true love,

Except for the lucky few who do,

To be in love with someone,

Is not to call them your soul mate,

Or one and only,

It is to be obsessed with only one,

And not ever change or falter,

For to be obsessed is to be an honor,

The honor of love

<3

Please don’t cry

Please don’t cry
I’m not really gone
When you look out the window
I’ll be standing on the lawn
Please don’t cry
I’ll see you again
Don’t be sad
Keep up your chin
Please don’t cry
I’m not really dead
When you cry yourself to sleep
I’ll be by your bed
Please don’t cry
Just because we had to part
As long as you remember me 
I’ll live in your heart
Please don’t cry
I’m not gone forever
I’ll be a cool and gentle breeze
In hot summer weather 
Please don’t cry
Don’t run and hide
When you need a shoulder to lean on
I’ll be by your side
Please don’t cry
When you’re sad and weak
I’ll be there
To kiss you on the cheek
Please don’t cry
This is just a goodbye
So please, oh please
Baby, do not cry

She and Me

She smiles, I cry.

She's brave, I’m shy.

She loves, I’m alone.

She’s amazing, I’m unknown.

She’s beautiful, I’m a mess.

She’s happy, I’m depressed.

She’s a fake, I am real.

My mask is perfect, she hides me.

A Face Among The Stars

I looked for you this morning, 
I looked for you last night,
I looked for you everywhere,
But you were not in sight.
I looked up to the night sky above,
And saw your face in the stars.
It was then I realized,
You’re not here anymore 
But you’ll always be with me…..
You will always be in my heart.
Life is something all of us must borrow
Returning it in time, to whence it came.
Good-bye doesn’t mean you’re gone,
So long as I still love you,
Your memory will live on.

meet me at the gate

A beautiful garden now stands alone,
missing the one who nurtured it
But now she is gone,
Her flowers still bloom, and the sun it still shines,
But the rain is like tear drops, for the ones left behind,
The weeds lay waiting to take the gardens beauty away,
But the beautiful memories of its keeper are in our hearts to stay,
she loved every flower even some that were weeds,
So much love she would plant with each little seed,
But just like her flowers she was part of Gods plan,
So when it was her time he reached down his hand,
He look through the Garden searching for the best,
That's when he found my love , it was her time to rest,
It was hard for those who loved her, to just let her go,
But God had a spot in his garden, that needed a gentle soul,
So when you start missing my love., remember if you just wait,
When God has a spot in his garden, She'll meet you at the gate

Over than 874 friends

Today i lived a dream and i'd like to share it with all my reader
Over than 874 friends pass and read my posts and that's made me feel so much happy and to thank all you i typed this words only for my reader .. my real friends

No other friends is quite like you,
No other friends could do exactly what you do.
No other friends could listen to my dreams,
No matter how weird it all seems.
You're the one thats there for me when i need a friend,
We're gonna be tight till the end.
We always have joy when we are together,
We always find something to share no matter what the weather.
No other friend could understand me like you do,
I dont know what i would do without a friends like all you.

Door Of Pain

In my life you're the one thing I fear, And before you die, this you must hear.
Everyday we were out to play, we'd laugh and joke, and together we'd stay.
Even Saturday's we'd go to the mall.
our great rapport was never to fall.
We had our favorite restaurants and we loved to eat, in our famous foot race, I was never to be beat.
We’d get in your truck and drive off to town, I was so happy my face was never to frown.
And as years past bye your pecan trees grew higher, and our relationship bond grew tighter and tighter. 
Something felt wrong and I hoped it wouldn’t happen.
But it did and I face it each day of my life, I got to be strong I’ve got to put down the knife.
What you did was so wrong and disgusting might I say, you'll never understand how I felt that day.
When people walk by and they start to wonder, I feel like the rain in a dark cold thunder.
I'm slowly coming down from this misery I'm in, I'm taking back what you have given because I'm giving in.
I can go to psychiatrists and spill out my thoughts, they can prescribe me pills and say I've been taught.
They can look at me and say "It's ok I Understand"
But they will never feel the fear of a, 'Lover's Hand'. 
You don't look back on what was begun, your losing your self in who you've become.
Now your gone to where you think its safe, where no one knows about the pain that I face.
Its so sad that your neighbors have no clue, all the people around you don't really know you.
Well Congratulations for fooling the world, but shame on you for hurting this man.
Don't worry too much but a day will come, when revenge will be given for the damage you've done. 
For right now I'll sit in the back of your mind, while you remember how I used to be kind.
And later on in your old pathetic life, you'll see me and how badly you ruined mine. 
You soon shall feel what I have felt for years, My head will turn, as your eyes fill with tears. 
Now before you die I hope you comprehend it, The pain you left now that its ended
I hope your new life is better mine
I'm sure your going on like everything's fine
And the day it hits you … what you didn’t see before, Will be that final day that I close that door
No more …!!

Her Special Door

Fallen here within her slipping grasp of time. She lives not for today but yet for then. Bound by the ones in memory of this bloodline. Each day passing becomes longer than the one before. Nothing ever changes here just beyond her special door. Many I have known but none to be as bold. She fights to show that she is not living in the past. Her heart that weeps over them feeds beneath her heart now cold. She weeps since then and it tears at her core. Nothing ever changes here just beyond her special door