Wednesday, September 19, 2012

There used to be days,

There used to be days,
When i was a witty and humorous guy, 
that i could make people laugh, 
until they start to cry, 
and i would often create stories
filled with such a humor and joy, 
that everybody would ask me 
how can u do it every time oh man. 
There used to be days....
Often i would tell things in such a way, 
and often i would act in such a way, 
that nobody could resist to laugh, 
however hard they may try, 
and even if it would be late for the day, 
and even if i would be done for the day, 
people used to hold me by hand, 
and they wont let me say good bye.
There used to be days....
While i was cruising really very fast, 
one day something happened that almost broke me apart, 
and in those few hours of storm, 
i lost whatever wit and humor i ever had, 
i thought the things would improve, 
but nothing happened as the days passed by, 
and i the witty and humorous guy became a silent and shy guy.
but there used to be days

Be yourself

You can never raise yourself much, 
by comparing yourself with others, 
today you are trying to outdo someone, tomorrow you will be bothered, by the achievements of some other.
You will be happy and bloat with joy, on the day when you beat the people, about whom you have started to bother, but then you will feel sad and doomed, when you will be outdone by the others. 
just sit and think for a moment, would the world have seen great works, of Einstein, newton and wright brothers, had they spent all their time thinking, how many fish today caught their neighbor.
from where Picasso, Vinci would have produced, such beautiful and great works of art, had their mothers and fathers always, 
kicked their butt and pushed them, to follow and to be like someone other. 
Great scriptures and great men always say, true success always comes to those, who follow their heart with faith and courage, work with patience, passion and diligence, 
while treating and helping everybody as brother.
and moreover at the end of the day, will you still count that as success? 
though living in a grand mansion, but inside of you still burning with, the fire of animosity, hatred and anger.

Monday, September 17, 2012

Burning forever

You cant kill this burning forever beating heart.
Even the face of devastation
hope swells with the power to completely overwhelms. 
Bring me to my knees and I still try please. 
You break me over and over.
my soul is mine to give. 
If I will it, it just might happen. 
You cant kill this burning forever beating heart
The love will never die. 
It destine to survive. 
As another tidal wave approaches my thoughts are of you. 
You have become the grease to the cogs that let me move. 
Like a giant here I am. 
Accept my hand if you can. 
you just cant kill this burning forever beating. 
Their is always worse. 
Like an unending curse. 
I stand here ready to serve. 
I know you are so much better then I deserve. 
Out of the dark into the light. 
With a millions sacrifices 
and still I feel 
oh how do I feel its still not enough.
So give me all the punishment you wish. 
Still my path not shall waver. 
For with my dieing breath I will still profess my love. 
You will never ever kill this burning forever beating heart. 

Gone

I've always been in the shadows.
i never felt a need to project myself.
I've always been dissapointed to look into the mirror.
my reflection always fears me.
i never thought i'd start cutting.
and now i am gushing blood.
never been so sad in my life.
it's only a knife.
how could that take my life ?

until i went too far.
and now im gone

Sunday, September 16, 2012

Pass a way love.in her birthday memory

Tears well up in my eyes, 
As I kneel frozen as ice, 
In front of your grave, bidding adieu; 
Having visions of the good times with you.
Through my eyes, I see you, 
In my tears I feel you.
When I close my eyes trying to forget you, 
In my heart, I can hear you.
I am merely nothing without you, 
Coz the better half of me was you.
True is my love to you; 
My vision shows me nothing other than you.
Will there be a time to see you anymore? 
Will my heart ever stop longing for you more and more? 
Those times, those good times we together had, 
Those thoughts are making me go mad.
My world is empty without you, 
It seems like my summer has died with you.
My body awaits the touch of you; 
But, all I can do is cry in front of you. 


in The pain memories of my wife birthday 18_9_1973

Hiding the pain

Hiding the pain
Starting to think i'm not longer sane
I've lost my innocence
Now to realize this makes no sense.
These deadly fears
Create those many tears
The end is not yet near
So here i am taking on these years.
The blood dripping down my arm
Thinking it does no harm
she's the light of my life
So there's no point to my knife. 

Clarity

When you’ve lost that which was there
Much that you said had not been fair
The Sheppard had left his staff for repair
The bells had gone silent 
The road had no bends 
Voices in the head drove one to despair.
The grass and the leaves had fallen
And autumn harbored winter’s air.

Waiting for you

To me about you as it counts the stars 
and frequently even excessively 
mainly there, it is you. 
The stars I have known, 
have consisted of only one thing, 
threes and sevens. 
Stars without you, 
'That star does not show, 
'at all in me-And you look at everything. 
When I see, the star dispersed about dawn it sings
of mourning, 'concerning your head. 
The star which is you I have not met, 
under any condition, therefore as for me, 
when I think of that which you spoke concerning you, 
however long is the way 
and I directly, 
'never with you, can I speak of it, 'excessively, 
you do not have to appear, yet when you do, 
and watching ... yet I'm still waiting for you.

Autumn_has come


Spring as my autumn it has come, 
when driftwood
by the wind and green the waves.
Eternal is flame, when passed on.
Heavy is my head, 
in the shape of your hands
birds flying high, clouds floating by.
The edges, the curves and none knowing why, 
at the crossroads of one, she hears my cry.
Spinning around looking down are the tears
looking up at the dawns, iridescent cold blue fire. 
Driftwood and sleep, letters and ink, 
left in the sand in the heat of the nights moon light. 
..
Sh.H

Friday, September 14, 2012

How i found you !!!

There's an angel in the smile on your face, 
There are emotions that are to strong to erase, 
I'll never stop you from eating away at my heart. 
And there is a part of this world that you have never known 
And why? 

all the fading colors have arrived. 
And this is how I found you. 
Hiding in a safer place where I was turned to go, 
You took me by the hand, made a soft place for me to land, 
And there is a part of this world that you have never known, 
And why? 

all the fading colors have arrived. 
And this is how I found you, 
Found you, Found you, Found you, here. 
Cheaters never prosper and winners never quit 
I'm not giving up on you, just one more time that is it. 
Yeah
And there's a pert of this world you have never known. 
And why? 

all the fading colors have arrived. 
And now .. could you tell me how I found you !!!

Someone in distress

Never turn the light out 
on someone in distress. 
Never turn your back 
on someone’s cry for help. 
Someday you maybe 
in the same predicament 
and it would be comforting to know, 
that around the corner 
there is someone who cares. 
Someone to give you a hand 
when you need it the most. 
So never turn the light out 
on someone in distress.

landscapes of our desires

In the landscape of our desires, 
it is the pinnacles 
we seek to reach. 
The burning passions 
of love and lust 
born only onto man. 
The heights of heaven, 
the unreachable thrown 
upon which sits our maker. 
The gusto’s of infinity 
beyond where no one goes 
in the landscapes of our desires 
we are captives of our mind 
serving out a sentence 
of which others left behind. 
The pregnant flame of youth 
where all are born again 
standing near the pinnacles 
in the landscapes of our desires.

Thursday, September 13, 2012

Darkness Freedom

 Maybe the things we've seen will scar us for life,
growing up we've seen wrong and very little of right, Sometimes we hear a sad song and tears roll down our face, we look in the mirror and feel so out of place, We don't want to become something larger than life, we want to become something real and so right, do they understand are we understood,
can life be better we wish that it could,  for sure before we make a decision we need to think twice, they say what can we do to help other's feel better 
I say anything possible because ... this is .. our life

I don’t respect the people that don’t respect me, I'm starting respect the people that deserve it, that’s how i’ll get somewhere in life.


Wednesday, September 12, 2012

أغيب وذو اللطائف لا يغيب


أغيب وذو اللطائف لا يغيب وأرجوه رجاء لا يخيب 

وأسأله السلامة من زمان بليت به نوائبه تشيب 
وأنزل حاجتي في كل حال إلى من تطمئن به القلوب 
فكم لله من تدبير أمر طوته عن المشاهدة الغيوب 
وكم في الغيب من تيسير عسر ومن تفريج نائبة تنوب 
ومن كرم ومن لطف خفي ومن فرج تزول به الكروب 
ومن لي غير باب الله باب ولا مولا سواه ولا حبيب 
كريم منعم بر لطيف جميل الستر للداعي مجيب 
حليم لا يعاجل بالخطايا رحيم غيث رحمته يصوب 
فيا ملك الملوك أقل عثاري فإني عنك أنأتني الذنوب 
وأمرضني الهوى لهوان حظي ولكن ليس غيرك لي طبيب 
فآمن روعتي واكبت حسودا فإن النائبات لها نيوب 
وآنسني بأولادي وأهلي فقد يستوحش الرجل الغريب 
ولي شجن بأطفال صغار أكاد إذا ذكرتهم أذوب 
ولكني نبذت زمام أمري لمن تدبيره فينا عجيب 
هو الرحمن حولي واعتصامي به وإليه مبتهلا أتيب 
إلهي أنت تعلم كيف حالي فهل يا سيدي فرج قريب 
في ديان يوم الدين فرج هموما في الفؤاد لها دبيب 
وصل حبلي بحبل رضاك وانظر إلي وتب علي عسى أتوب 
وراع حمايت وتول نصري وشد عراي إن عرت الخطوب 
وألهمني لذكرك طول عمري فإن بذكرك الدنيا تطيب 
وقل عبد الرحيم ومن يليه لهم في ريف رأفتنا نصيب 
فظني فيك يا سندي جميل ومرعى ذود آمالي جميل 
وصل على النبي وآله ما ترنم في الآراك العندليب
I stay away ... that's my religion, We aren't a killer

September 11th

in remembrance of the people who have lost their lives on a dreadful day
this wont be so much of a poem, but I've got something to say
On September 11th people all over the world will remember that day. So much violence and hatred in this world. It is so unfair to the parents who had to endure this day knowing their child is somewhere else than with you at a time like this. It is also unfair to the people who died because of people's careless acts. September will always be a day of silence for me. Knowing that my parent got deeply affected by peoples acts.

but if i need to show my opinion in this day ...!!
It was zero day to start the war against Terrorism, 
It was the day that each one in USA should think more about .. is it really that Islam was the reason behind this.. i dare you .. that's a fool thinking
So many facts shown another hidden hands on this action, and let us start with this fact about this Fake governor called USA .. 10 years later from now and NASA secret reports will show in public to tell all you that there is no no nobody could land in Moon surface .. So, whom made all the US ppl believe this big lie will makes anyone believe that Islam was behind this forbidden acts.
..
by the way i have 13 reports to show anyone the truth about the big lie ..Landing in Moon, and finally governments finally play them dirty acts with us .. nations or humans just to satisfy them ambitions.
God bless all the Innocent lives..


روجت إدارة الرئيس الأمريكي السابق جورج بوش لوقائع مزيفة واستندت على كذبة أحداث 11 سبتمبر لتبرير شن الحرب على الإرهاب العالمي ( الإسلامي كما يزعمون ) ,,, فكان لزاماً تفسير الحقيقة المؤلمة بشأن هذه الأحداث المكذوبة وفضح تورط الإدارة الأمريكية في هذه الهجمات على برجي مركز التجارة العالمي لدلائل تشير إلى صعوبة وقوع مثل هذه النوعية من الهجمات دون مشاركة عناصر مهمة من الحكومة الأمريكية والجيش والدفاع وبعض حلفاء الإدارة الأمريكية، إذ أن غزو أفغانستان كان مخططاً له وحظى بموافقة الرئيس الأمريكى جورج بوش قبل هجمات ١١ سبتمبر على العاصمة الأمريكية .

حقيقة كذبة 11 سبتمبر :

تتمثل النقطة الأولى في التدليل على تورط الرئيس بوش، وتشيني، في هذا الأمر لرفضه تحديد لجنة تقصي الحقائق عن ١١ سبتمبر على الرغم من ضغوط أهالي الضحايا، فضلاً عن طلبه من رئيس الأغلبية في الكونجرس بإجراء تحقيق محدود في هذا الأمر ، واشتراط استجوابه وتشيني على انفراد دون تسجيل لذلك .

النقطة الثانية ، في عدم تعرض القوات الجوية الأمريكية ، التي تخضع لسلطة نائب الرئيس الأمريكي ، ديك تشيني ، حينها للطائرات التي استهدفت مركزي التجارة العالمي ، إذ أنه من غير المنطقي أن القوات الجوية الأمريكية لم يكن في استطاعتها منعها فور إقلاعها ، وهو ما يدل على تورطه في الأمر .

وتتمثل النقطة الثالثة في حقيقة أن المتهمين بالتخطيط لهذه الهجمات ، كان من الأفضل لهم إذ ما كانوا متورطين في الأمر ويستهدفون الإدارة الأمريكية ، أن يستهدفوا مكتب وزير الدفاع رامسفيلد، ومكاتب القيادات العسكرية العليا عند ضربهم مبنى البنتاجون ، وليس ضرب جانباً من المبنى كان خالياً نسبياً ويخضع للتصليحات .

وفيما يتعلق بتدمير برج التجارة العالمي ، يأتي الاتهام الثالث للإدارة الأمريكية والجيش بالتخطيط للأمر ، إذ انهيار البرجين بهذه الطريقة ، التي أكد المهندسين أنها حدثت نتيجة ذوبان الحديد والمعدن في هيكل المبنيين ، لا يمكن أن تتسبب فيها درجة حرارة الحريق الذى نشب عقب ضرب الطائرتين، خاصة أنه تم تأكيد وجود بقايا لمادة الكبريت ، ومزيج من مسحوق الألومنيوم والحديد في الغبار الذي أسفر عنه التدمير ، وهاتان المادتان لا يتم استخدامهما إلا بواسطة الجيش الأمريكي ، بل ويتم تطويرهما داخل معامله .

وآخر الاتهامات تتمثل في رفض الإدارة الأمريكية إجراء أي تحقيق جنائي لكشف حقائق الأمر ، وعدم توجيه أي تهم جنائية رسمية لأسامة بن لادن ، خاصة أن تبنيه مسؤولية الحادث عبر شريط فيديو بعد الحادث يدل على أن هذه الشرائط مزيفة .

Tell Me !!

tell me if you care
love me if you dare
please if you fear
don't shead a tear
sing me a song
as i follow along
give me a chance
as i grant you a dance



May i .. wish all you a wonderful evening

Tuesday, September 11, 2012

Fatality

Deep inside my own hate.
Deep inside my own disgrace.
that feirce taste of regret.
that feirce fear of not knowing who to trust.
the aching pain of betrayal.
the betrayed and the betrayer.
the constant reinactment of my hellful past.
that constant thought of hate.
stuck inbetween life and death.
where to go from here? 
what to do from here? 
can i escape this hell abyss? 
or will my fatal reality eat me alive? 
tortured by this insane sensation of death.
it's screaming my name.
who do i turn to? 
do i put my trust and heart out there again? 
or let my 'friends' continue to feast on it? 
love; the new hate.
Fear; the new brave.
hell; the new heaven compared to earth.
life itself is un-bearable.
life is just a sick game.
people are the evil pawns.
i am the target.
i'm ready for the face of death.
will death be beautiful or vulgar? 
i'm ready for the serene darkness, full of screaming silence.
hit me..

Monday, September 10, 2012

Behind The Footlights

I stand behind the footlights, 
wait for the curtain to fall, 
another night will be over, 
and tomorrow another stage will call. 
For a travelling minstrel, 
on a tour of one night stands, 
knowing at home there is someone special, 
with beckoning arms outstretched, 
awaiting for this lonesome traveller, 
to return to those loving arms again. 
Each day that I’m on the road, 
I can’t wait to get back home, 
to the warmth of my family, 
and my loving home. 
One day I will earn enough, 
so I don’t have to travel or roam, 
then I can settle down 
in my loving home. 
Until that day comes along, 
each day will be a lonely one, 
and no one will ever see the tears 
I hide as the curtain falls. 
No one will know the loneliness 
that follows me each day. 
It is only when I see the lights, 
from our home windows glow, 
that my heart will lift, 
and love will again flow. 

Eyes of Passion

Passion, the forbidden fruit of love....
masked by layers of deception....
shrouded in the mystery of the eyes...
eyes that tell no lies as the tongue speak those lies..
feelings expressed through these eyes....
windows to the heart's desires.....
waiting for pleasures that will feed those fires
simmering, seething, glowing.....
eyes....watching, willing and waiting 


Sunday, September 09, 2012

End The Game

This fatal reality
This strong hostility
Wishing my wrists were bleeding
To stop the pain from the beatings.
Out screaming these lies
Uncovering my cries.
My frost-bitten spirit, 
And i can't bare it.
Wishing for the truth
Show me the proof.
I'm coping with the pain
But i end up with these blood stains
I try to make a sound
But it's too profound.
I hear you loud in clear
But it still doesn't take away my fear
I refuse
And yet i'm still being used
I was too late
And now all i have is fate
I tried to debate
But now im left with hate
I'm done with the pain
So let's end the game

Strong words!

LOVE; 
an overused lie. feelings to one's true soul-mate.
HATE;
an overused, dramatic way to say i REALLY don't like you.

a deep, bruning passion of disslike for something or someone.
another way to say, i love you.
PROMISE; 

usually an unkept word of doing something for sure; an oath.
HOPE: 

a beg for somthing to come true and is usually declined; a desperate need/want.
HEARTBROKEN: 

a damaged heart/soul mainly caused by loss of love and guys; break ups, and being let down; deeply hurt feelings.
KIDDING: 

an excuse for saying somthing offensive; usually doesn't make you laugh but makes you angered.
RELATIONSHIP: 

a soon to be heart-break; a long lasting love with someone.
HAPPY: 

complete; fulfillment
SAD: 

incomplete; let down
PEACE: 

a want for all to love; a impossible want

Unanswered questions

Where did the light go? 
and when did the darkness take over ? ! 
everything's out of place! 
where did the love go? 
and when did violence become the new peace ? ! 
it's all so hatefully.
where did the happiness go? 
and when did the depression take over ? ! 
it's not right. ..!!
and when did the lonelyness become company ? ! 
and when did this obsession of black come back ? ! 
and why is suicide such a want ? ! 
where did all the tears come from ? ! 
where's all the blood coming from ? ! 
why am i so angered ? ! 
why has 'god' let me down ? ! 
why am i in pain ? 
why am i such a mistake? ! 
why am i still alive? ! 
why am i even here? ! 
why is it so hard to smile? ! 
how did all this come upon me? 
why arent the pills working? 
why does this world have to be so cruel

Internal Conflict

This deep internal rage burns through my veins.
my internal torture eats me alive.
these thoughts put me in an instant haze of pain.
my dignity has been murdered in an on-slaught war.
these tears plummet down my face with the sting of toxic waste.
my blood-shot eyes give me a new look to my already too ugly face making it more painful to look at my reflection.
these sensations of death they take over and gain control.
i try to fight back these feelings but just end up deeper in the abyss inside.
with my adreniline rush, heart speeding, hate rage, haze, and acid tears im slowly dieing, dieing a painful death.
the heavenly screamo music flooding my ears put me in some trans of this unfamiliar feeling......
love.!
hope.!!
joy.!!!
no.....
happiness.!
happiness.!!
happiness, a VERY unfamiliar feeling; a stranger.
suddenly everything.....just instantaneously dissapears.
temporarily gone, but im accepting the fact that this so called 'happiness' isn't going to last long, rage will soon murder it too

Monday, September 03, 2012

Being a fool is easier


Those words may not always be there to say,
What feelings felt in moments bring.
And finding in my mind what my heart knows best...
Sometimes from my lips are not there to confess.
I am not trained to disconnect,
From sensitivities I don't expect.
I am not trained to just neglect...
My eyes from impressions.
Or my ears from remembered lessons.
I choose to move in forward steps.
Sweeping away experiences...
I have yet to perfect.
What I do is done with a truth I pursue.
Making excuses for myself I refuse to do.
And admitting this is not difficult.
Since I will be the first to say...
Being a fool is easier.
Than to hide and have someone decide,
If I am trying to hard to say what's inside. 

Facebook Friend!

Hi my Dear Facebook Friend! 
My dear friend! You made me cry today! ! 
I can see you and your smile as
For years that I knew you in 
In contacts made with you on and off.
Suddenly you are not any more.
Not to be found. Not to be heard.
Not there in the mind's eye anymore… …
That how you’d be if you’d be..! 
The times we’d think of you
Are just moments only, and of no other
Consequences, whatsoever at all.
This is the common paradox.. 
When we are dead or divorced or
Gone beyond the wall.. that we 
Are away in some horizon.. it’s called
Oblivion! But we are still there? 
This is the paradox.. that I could have
Talked once more. Could have
Known a little more from you.
Could somehow be with you to
Steal away a moment that took you! 
This is the paradox.. that you are
The name that would be forgotten.
The email id that would be no more.
Some love that wouldn’t be lost.
And would smile for evermore! 
How can I stop thinking of you? But
The fact, who am I writing to, here now
Confronts me and then I leave you friend! 
Just say good bye 
With a few tears

The shadows of my mind.

There are lots of memories locked away 
within the shadows of my mind. 
Memories of childhood years gone by 
and they are located in the dark recesses 
awaiting one day to escape from 
within the shadows of my mind. 
We tend to hide away 
the sad things in our lives, 
locking them away 
never to see again the light of day. 
We wish not to resurrect 
all their sadness and pain. 
Therefore, we store them away 
within the shadows of our mind. 
In the shadows, hold many tragedies 
of which we do not want to relive. 
The pain grows constantly 
just thinking of them again. 
So as I close each chapter 
of my life as it unfolds 
the memories that bring 
the most pain are locked away 
within the shadows of my mind.

If she's happy

If she's happy, I'm happy, especially when it flows from her to me, 
The mind wonders forwards and back across the seven seas, 
To bring me back to a place where my heart is free, 
For if fate denies me the opportunity to see her again, 
Denies me one last chance to try and make amends, 
Then remember the heart is yearning, almost reminiscing of a time spent, 
Between great friends, attempting to find contentment in each other's arms,
Take me back to the one who brought the calm, before the storm, 
Then the heart is torn, forlorn, gone, hurt and eventually reborn, 
Because the knowledge that her smile is wide and her heart is at peace, 
Is enough to put me to eternal sleep, 
If she walks away, I'll stand and wait, no hurt, no guilt, no pain, 
Knowing that she's happy takes all that away, 
And I'll move on, to brighter days, feeling nostalgic about the good old days, 
but it's okay, its fine, her happiness is mine, 
she said if i forget her, she'll forget me, 
but I cant, because only if she's happy, I'm happy, and especially when it flows from her to me

Trust ..

They say they want the truth, others say they can't handle the truth
They say the truth never sounded this good, 
When the truth was about peace and love, 
Some say the truth is lost somewhere among the 7 seas, 
Others say only the truth is what really sets us free, 
I was told that the truth is stranger than fiction, 
And within it lies the honesty of our addictions, 
And for us to reach the truth with any real conviction, 
We must battle through everyone of one life's daily afflictions, 
The truth is we witness genocide, hate, lies and hypocrisy, 
And these beautiful words cant mask all the profanity, 
Some say the truth is out there, 
Others dare not find or worse they dont really care, 
They say that the truth is neither here nor there, 
I heard the truth is found in a cold stare, 
Or a mother's grief at a loss she can not bear, 
Some say that real truth is rare, 
In a world which is cold, unscrupulous and unfair, 
They say that the truth hurts, with no remedy for the discomfort, 
The truth is people lie, 
Become occupied with doing more wrong than right, 
Others believe the truth can be whatever you like, 
Whatever you say, read or write, 
A man told me truth is the only thing you will never find, 
because truth is unobtainable in this world of mine, 
I was lead to believe that the truth is right, 
but truth changes depending on its source of mind, 
They don't want us to know the truth, 
Because the truth is what separates them from us, 
The truth gives us the hope in a smile and bonds a trust, 
Love is truth in its most sincerest form, 
Such as the truth from a mother when her child is born, 
Or the forlorn look when her child is gone, 
The truth is everywhere, we're just too blind to see it, 
The truth was sent to us by Allah, the truth is in this room I can feel it, 
The truth is in our minds, hearts, souls and spirits.
It shall prevail and make you believe, 
The truth my friend shall set you free
The truth can can be what ever you want it to be, 
Whatever is in your heart, what ever you trully believe, 
That is filled with love, hope and prosperity, 
Whenever they try and blind you but you can still see
Whenever they try and choke you but you can still breathe
Whenever they try and oppress you but you are still free
When you do right by those who have done you wrong
When you can get on ur knees and pray to the Lord
Every morning, when light falls from the heavens to the skies, 
He reveals the truth to me, 
In a manner within which these words could never describe.