I’m still alive

Feelings hurt but never die, that’s why it hurts to say goodbye... And when you left to live your life I wondered how I would survive
But life has changed us along the ride.... Now I know I must exist beside..
Wither to live it up or ride it out, Is this what it’s all about
Learn to run and hide, rather than just decide
As time goes by... A little more softly ... I die
Stronger now than before maybe but I still can’t open up that door
And just, just forget the past or find out why it couldn’t last
And as sure as the world turns... I know our love did once burn
But what changed along the way... That caused us both to stray..
I know we hadn't decide.. Wither to live it up or ride it out
Is this what it’s all about, Learn how to run and hide, rather than to just decide
As time goes by... The truth of love never remains a lie.
When I found your smile belong to anyone new, while my heart always belonged to you, My smile and heart refuse to believe... that it was me who made you leave..
But now I refined happiness as your heart belongs only to me
Rather than falling out of love I’m now happy and proud of this special person that in you I have found.. This sounds like a story of what once was.. is, and will be.
Living it up, rather than riding out, That’s what life is all about, rather than run and hide I’ve learned how to decide
As time goes by.. I’m still alive..

Love...

Own, possess and enjoy
That is the desire
That is the aim
That is the motto
Of everyone who craves for love, So it is selfishness.. In every sense
True love is when you find happiness
In the happiness of whom you love
So never try to own never try to possess
Someone else's heart when the truth is that you cannot even possess
Your own heart...! !

Losting Goodnight ..

Here we are... Lying in the midst of our discomfort, Hand not in hand.. We may still have a chance to survive and I am incapable of breathing in this air..  nothing here
To hold against my heart and cherish this lonely sky, So vast and sorrowful in its beauty.. I lose myself in the dark mysteries of the night
A shallow lust for this darkness that harbors deep intensity tugs at my soul
And opens up a door for deeper dreams
Time passes quickly I watch the sun begin to rise and in its glory I see colors that will forever stay unnamed
I’ve been here before but always seem to forget this lonely truth
I lay my head back down and wait for the peaceful night to return

You belong.... To the man you'll think of when you wake up...

When I wake up every morning I always watch you for a while
Then I kiss you very lightly, Watch you lips turn to a smile.
Then you ask me what the time is and I whisper in your ear
That.. Does the hour hardly matters when you're lying warm and near.
Your smile grows slightly wider, But you turn your face away,
Hide your head under the pillow, Try to cheat the break of day.
Your hair wisps round about you, Flows like water to your hips,
But your neck soon bare before me feels the pressure of my lips.
Then I touch you very lightly, run my fingers down your spine,
And your body gently waking turns till eyes gaze into mine.
And in that very moment.... As your mouth seeks to entice,
When I wake up every morning, I am lost in your paradise.

I wish i could ink my words..

I wish i could ink my words would pour, Like melting snow in springtime thaw
To meet in rhyme that magical magnifies, The flowing verse beneath the skies.
My words would leap of rocks below, Then thunder back... Into the flow
Till currents mix sweet syllables, That tumble down ... Great waterfalls.
I wish i could ink my words but sometimes... sometimes it rains in deserts or even snows in June, Sometimes a burning sun is cooled behind the moon.
Sometimes the wisest words are spoken by the young.
Sometimes the treasure's not golden, Sometimes the love won,
Sometimes the road not taken is where the path begun.
Sometimes when all is rotten, when hope is gone, your foe is worthy and helps you carry on.
Sometimes a miracle happens and the fear's misplaced,
Sometimes the hope that's lost is once again embraced.
Sometimes our tears are happy,
Sometimes the hate undone,
Sometimes the chains are broken and the world stands up as one. 
Sometimes I wish i could ink my words, joyfully as anyone.

Home-Way

Shooo..  silence wraps its fingers around my throat daring me to breathe, A teasing breath of air... Lying on the floor, seeing nothing to save my soul, distant memories appear inside my fading mind
A man so weak, yet brave for his age... Lies awake ... the terrors of the night force his mind to work hard, see the whole world against him still fight,
New thoughts and questions run through his tired mind.. far away from the night where he finds himself.
Now, lying on the cold floor, I let my mind carry me away..To places unknown
I dream of dreams untold.. truly is not to fold, I feel my chest tighten as air is kept from me... I live as survival kicks in.. Do I know who really I am, who I suppose to be..!
Breathing in the bittersweet air, tears come.... to my eyes, I’m alive, Being here now in this place.... Finlay i found home... 
Now I no longer fear the dark
Now I now have learned....
The light will always prove to be brighter
The dark will always run away
And on this line I find peace, i find my home-way.

Anyone..

What you need from life is so much for anyone,
What i need from earth isn't anyone but only you..

A dream with the sun

Oh, the empty dreams were dim and the empty dreams were wide,
They were sweet and shadowy houses where my thoughts could hide.
You took my empty dreams and filled them one by one,
With tenderness, nobleness ... lightness like noon Sun.
Heavenly places and heavenly faces, See that golden hue
Burning in the East... my dreams are with that color.. My dreams are the sun
The sun always sets but never seems to rise
That sun carries my dreams slowly out of my reach
I watch it slide away leaving me behind and the color disappears
My dreams are with that sun whenever the sun sets.. It rises in another place
A place blessed by that light
My dreams are hidden in that light
At my window seat
I watch the sun take it all away
My dreams are with the sun
My dreams are the sun, where nobody suppose to catch.
I came to you without me, you come to me without you..

Summer sun..

 Your smile, your eyes, are brighter than the summer sun, for through the years you're the only one.
If we could be together, just you and I forever, alone and free.
How happy life could be. Beneath God golden beem, you are the Moon, and for sure I'm not the sun but you and I could spoon.
One little kiss from you, a prayer with a bliss... O,  could make my dreams come true, if only it could be.... When you smile the sun shines bright within the heavens, but when you frown the tears in my heart pour down.
You are my sunshine, moon, and stars,
your eyes are brighter than the summer.

for you.. and me

One's weakness will always remain, within the heart of men in pain.
Whether to stay, or to die, climbing the walls... or sit and cry.
Reaching for answers within one's soul, asking, God.... when will they go.
But the more they ask, beg, and plead, the more never will their souls be freed.
They reach and grasp before at God golden light, and pray to him to make this useless life right.
But the answers always lie within our fate, and for someone like you and me it always comes..... too late.

eyes of marble...

Sweet light that shines above me so bright, I beg that you shine forever, and a night.
Music I hear whenever you talk,
I need you so near as in the moonlight we walk. Lips of crimson, eyes of marble , as you look at me, God smiles down on thee so true.
Whispers of love we say in the night, passion, and hope, dare we such plight ?
Dreaming, and hoping all for the day, when into the night shall we slip away.

magically.. if I...

If  I Get charged to this madness world, there will be  many changes I would make.
It would be required that happiness shone from everyone’s eyes, not hate or oppression.
I would require everyone to love each other and care for those suffering from the pains of illness.
I would want it to be a happier and more loving place of lasting peace.
There would be no wars, no hurt in anyone’s life.
Life would be long and held with respect.
this is what I would require, but sadly I do not and my dreams are just dreams of a place we call tranquillity.
However, if I can... I would want to make tranquillity into our own reality

ink heart

There is a justifies pen, release pen, tempting pen and another pen can decide,
There's a pen his owner is prince, another in a hand of prisoner, 
There is a pen ink from the heart, can shaking minds,  playing the true tunes with harmony, amazing and another pen so enjoyable while there is also a dark pen and another sending light... Cleaning the gloom of every bad night.
Probe as you write, for what you write is written for you as Victory or on you with shame.

Beyond this sunset

Beyond this sunset Once upon  a time there was a life waiting  for reveal, the sun was the witness... Moon listening to all promises... Respect was the deal,
BBeyond this sunset there was a dreams, sail through uncharted waters looking for a place to land...  A place to become fertile so we can touch them with hand.
A dreams are filled with imagery of what we want our life to be.I f we could only lead them home  our life would be what we wanted it to be. 
Beyond this sunset ...

Appreciate what still remains

How do we know what path to choose
one determinants our destiny, another determinants our own decisions
which one is wrong
which one is right
should she sacrifice things to get her own decision out or should she goes with the flow and follow her destiny
is she willing to hurt other people to get what she wants, or is she gonna goes by the way god told her where destiny is.
they sky is dark and so is the heart, its like they split the heart in two, but one day She'll find some one better than him, and he hopes she will too.

When I can't trust me..!

I am walking in darkness, even though there is Sun, I am stuck in my tracks, when I am trying to run.... Just the thought of loneliness.. and I am undone.
I write these words, with sadness ripping me apart, Laughter is on my lips, but tears are on my heart... You see, I feel, oh so very much alone, And this feeling goes straight to the core.. to the bone.
For I am surrounded by people who are laughing with me and I hide from them, with plain smiles they can see the simplest of masks, that hides me so well
The purest of disguises, so easy to sell
I am a creature born to help those around me but deep down inside, I face my struggles solitary, Filled with self doubt, with uncertainty
Who Do I turn, when I can't trust me.. I mean, look at this way, look at how I can see it... !!
Who can I trust, if I can't trust my own shit..!
Who can carry me, if I can't walk on my own feet..!
Who else could fulfill such an undaunted feat.!!
So I wipe them away, each and every little tear, Each want, each worry, each misplaced fear
And I trudge on, where fake smiles are founded, Wholly, sorrowfully, and completely alone, yet surrounded.

Paper Dreams

Right now the mind is blank,
right now have an empty heart;my dreams pause at a wasted bank,
then words flow without a path... Fragile as the paper boats,they float
with short lived glee; knowing fully, death's a truth and awaits them constantly. 
Yet... We couldn't complain
When ego declines, your heart's insistence; love, converse in silence..
When words cease to exist and mind repudiates; love, converse in silence..
When each word you say is always held against; love, converse in silence..
When asked to quit the game far worse, you couldn't complain; love's too terse with silence.! 

Giving up life

The wounds began to build up, quicker than I had thought The pain began to amplify, from the lies others had wrought.
I sit alone, in my room, thinking about my life, Backing away, taking a look, at this world of strife.
I lean back in my chair, letting a deep sigh escape, Hearing all those lies replayed on an endless tape
My father telling me about the miracles of fate, How I was a mistake, There was no love, only hate... My whole life has been one wound after another, No matter how much I looked, I couldn't find even a single soul brother.
No one to help me through all my suffering an pain, No one to keep my dry through this world of rain.
So, I sit up here in my room, afraid of the light, Switching it off, not sure how much longer I can fight, Alone in this world, wanting to be set free... Wondering, if anyone in this world would miss me.
And then, 
I think I make my decision, To plunge into the dark world of sin, I finger the tip of a blade, wondering if I should cause a flood to cut into my wrists, open them up and see the blood... or I could just as easily throw the throttle, drive to fast, or take all the pills in the bottle... Could drift away so soft and quiet, Would my passing even cause the smallest of a riot, I can feel the tightening of this world's noose, Tightening around my throat, not letting me loose
I can feel the darkness closing in around me, Blotting out my vision, I don't think I can see... Is this death, is this what it feels like to die?
I don't know what I am doing, I don't know why?
Why did I choose to end it all instead of living?
Now that I am dead, What I am giving?
All those people that i Had let down?
Just because I let my troubles wash me up and I drowned in the sea of my own transgression, When I realize now, I had my own mission... There are people out there, that need me, people who looked at me as their only key.
Then, 
with a gasp, I rise from my sleep, I had been lost, in the world so deep, My unconscious mind had tried to tell.. That if I ended it all, My world would be hell
Even if my whole family tries to destroy, All that i Have built, There is still someone out there, who looks up and sees, A person they can trust, perhaps a hero in me...
So for all of you, who want to end it, who wish to go bye
Think of all that you are leaving behind before you die
Think of your friends, I am sure you have one.
Think of your unborn children, your future daughter or son
Think of the memories you are throwing away
Because you can't hang on for just another day
I know I know, no one knows what you feel, No one has been what you have been through, don't know what is real... Trust me on this, you are completely wrong ?
If you think you are alone, you are singing a false song, You are not alone, other have been where you are, Others have felt worse pain, and have worse scars
And they can live and fight and strive for more, Keep on trucking no matter how sore, Pick themselves up when knocked to the floor because they love memories and just want more.
But this isn't a plea for you to not die.. This is a plea, for you to ask why ?
Instead of looking to the bad looking to the night, To stop dwelling on the dark, and live in the light... Because if you weigh the good with the bad, and look at these things without getting mad, You'll understand that the twenty, forty or less years that are past you, are filled with many fears,
But also, somewhere, there is happiness and joy, So turn up your head, You girl, or you Boy ... And remember all those around you that mean something to you, they love you... and you aren't a toy.
And they, they are the reason you need to keep hold on, move on, carry on and .. and never ever give up.

The ashes of my mind

There's nothing to see here, The streets are all clear, Nothing but fear, If only you could be near, I return to those few yesteryear, To think of what I must held dear,
And here is another dead end, another closed door, no way in, and nothing to explore, There's nothing inside me any more, I'm not what it is you are looking for... There is nothing left here.
Nothing lives here any more, just apathy, I feel no joy like before, nor sympathy, No music echoes to write my symphony, The streets are all .... empty.
I.. 
Gotta squash the fear
Gotta make it clear
Gotta dream a way
Today... Is the sound of emptiness, and I'm alone in the darkness, there's nothing inside, I just wanna close my eyes and hide, Pretend I'm not crying and dying inside.
No wonder my thought bring nothing but rain, And no wonder I gave all my world nothing but pain, I've got nothing inside of me left to share
There's nothing left in there, I lost the best of me behind, The flame that had once burned so bright, today became the ashes of my mind.

Agony

If you think that you are sane, you should know that life is pain.
And in that pain we have to choose, most of us seem to lose.
but what it is most of us don't see, is that life brings nothing kind to me.
All I feel day by day, as my stability fades away... is that my life is a death in agony.