Thursday, March 08, 2012

Paying in same coin

I never think of paying in same coin for retaliation
Even though there is attack with provocation
When my branches lower with load towards ground
Such changed in attitude from mankind is found
I think of it many a times but draw no conclusion
It sends me odd feeling with some confusion
How can passers by forget the fruits and shade? 
When road was certainly deserted or forbade? 
Who provides them safety and comforts? 
Is there not some relaxation on the way or of that sort? 
Nature has never deserted you in any extreme
Why sudden change to challenge the authority of the supreme? 

It is not the case with human beings alone
The natural wealth is mercilessly spoiled even
Its reckless use may bring certain level of disaster
We gain the status of orphans and not that of master 
This is not the only case where we are facing extinction
Forests are cut at enormous level and there is no new induction
The cyclones and floods take heavy toll of human power and properties
How long we may face such cruelty and uncertainties? 
There is clear warning to all sections
The earth is loosing its belt very fast during action
Complete vacuum inside heavy plates
There is nothing more left to relate
We are sinking fast with volcano fire
How much ash is spread in atmosphere? 
It may erupt again to cause disasters
We must forget to become sole masters

What will be gain if we loose our entity? 
Become refugee in our own land with so much pity? 
Where is the line to maintain good quality? 
When there is rise in dishonesty and criminality? 
Maintain the level if can't improve further
Obey the natural rules and surrender
Earth has enough to feed you with protection
Take preventive measure with simply actions,

Wednesday, March 07, 2012

Peace and Honor


Of course, anyone can break a match, but it was impossible to break the bundle of it. What i meant by this is, peace and honor should go together
It is big question to understand and bother
It involves no big or small nations
But question of deep attachment in relation
No country may want to live under shame
Popular will in this sense can't be blamed
The tolerance has its limit and may anytime explode
At any time to attain the real freedom
Even bad rulers may be tolerated
If their steps are welfare oriented
Certain amount of misrule is also of less concern
Until it speaks of no bad intention and turn
The desert fox connived for higher ambition
It exceeded all civil norms and limitations
People could no more trust for their lives
Normal men had no means with peace to live
Country could afford no more burdens
It needed out burst with ignition all of sudden
One more fatal blow and nation was to be restored
To its full glory of past and honored
Finally it has seen the golden day
Peace has finally descended in its own way
Country has witnessed enough of bad blood
There is shortage of medicines, commodities and food
Egyptian people are brave and blessed with natural wealth
There is enough to eat and manage for good health
If people are happy and remain united
It is befitting occasion to feel as liberated
Any nation may feel proud with its ancient heritage
Only rulers take note of it and ably manage
Whether system is democratic or with semi pattern
It must be happily shared by all without any concern
We all must wish this young nation a prosperous start
Live in harmony with neighbors and never depart
From stated position of non-interference and neutrality
That shall certainly grant peaceful atmosphere with 
stability

Friends Forever

We have been friends for not so long
We've learned to trust and shared a song
We used to laugh and used to cry
We've been together and learn to fly
Those sweet memories we both have shared
I will always treasure, I will always care
For all those moments we've been together
Are oh so precious, more precious than jewels 
I wish no hardships and pains arrived
That blocks this feeling and forever deprived
For if I loose the inspiration you've shared
My heart in agony, forever will suffer
With all my heart, I do sincerely pray 
That this precious friendship forever will stay
Deep in my soul, a vow I will offer
You'll always be my friend, 

My soul mate, my little flower
from now until forever.

Talking to my heart



As I sit in the cool of the evening. Enjoying the evening breeze, my mind races back through a thousand years. Yesterday I try to recall. Lost in the sands of time. Tracing things that could have been, should have been, would have been, but was not. Never will be. Now I must face the reality before me. I must speak to my heart, as a father gently guiding his child. The truth must be told. 
In this journey, we cannot have 
everything we want. Sometimes we want 
in vain. We must except what is given 
us, and move forward.
Sometimes it is painful for a heart to
remain open. You are inviting many
strangers to take up residence. Occupy
space not intended for them.
The time has come for you to look away, 
close your door for the winter season
is approaching. Soon the skies will
become cloudy and gray. A Chill will
fill the air. The day becomes misty.
Lock your door tightly now, toss the
key into the bottom of the ocean. Wrap
up in a warm cozy blanket of protection.
Go to sleep, sleep well my baby, my woman, my mommy
Spring will arrive soon. 


Tuesday, March 06, 2012

You have to walk .. alone

With tears in your eyes 
With burdens of past on your shoulders 
With heart full of pains 
You have to walk alone 
When you were on demand 
There were people around you 
Friends and relatives 
Near ones and dear ones 
Demands were met 
Desires were fulfilled 
All left at once 
And left you high and dry 
The green pastures 
And garden of flowers 
All vanished and deserted you 
Now what you see before you 
Is vast stretch of sands 
You have to walk alone 
With tears in your eyes 
With burdens of past on your shoulders 
With heart full of pains

The Lovers Last Dance

With rain and storm it crosses the line 
Screeching brakes screams, 
Shattered glass so fine, 
Silence but, for a spinning wheel 
As spirits rise hold hands and kneel.
Your body attracts the moonlight, 
The stars shine on so bright
May I have this dance? 
Shall we..!!
Dance an angel dance, 
In a lovers trance as kin
To the sway of the foxtrot, 
And I've got you under my skin.
Entwine with me, vibe the rhythm of life.
Soothing the senses, with feelings run rife.
Dance angel dance, 
Thru rainbows silver mist, 
Swirling with tear coloured clouds 
Just to be kissed.
We dance on, up, high in the sky, 
A new dance is nigh.
Strauss has provided the last waltz of wonder, 
As powerful to compare to dancing thunder.
When we reach heaven with steps guided true
Believe me, 
You'll know that for ever
I will always 
Love you 

About missing you


An eclipse of the heart, 
rips the soul apart.
Nostalgic promises, never to behold.
Standing alone at the alter, 
my love you loudly sold.
Now let me tell you  my last words bold
Disagreements will come, 
disagreements will go
being right
seems important so
if I may, 
I would like 
to shed a little light, 
being kind
more important than 
being right.

Sunday, March 04, 2012

Manmade money


Who are we if we are nothing...
If reason stands a chance against no chance
But opportunity still presents a face
And blithely we appreciate, such fate, and chance and grace...
The grace bestowed upon the powerless
One who humbly accepts without care
Then kneels to the ground and remains there
Is something else, but not a gift
Blindness dose not appreciate truth
And truth does not see blindly
What face, a face, of a million faces 
gives kindly,
The paper rolls deep, the coins shimmer
The shimmer catches the corner of the eye
And the eyes are made complacent 
As the ears and voice dissent 
From this...
A name can be whispered into a sea of pure water
But who will see the voice
And who will heed the call
While all the eyes are busy watching
The tempestuous affairs of emotion
And for every coin there is an agent
One wanting more, and getting none
One taking all and getting some
One giving all and getting one
And all come under the same rule of thumb
Blind, deaf and dumb
If we are nothing then who are we
But gifted by the donor
A pure pool of water
to a sightless image of love
Now you asking more, and getting pun
Now you pushing more, and getting thin
Now i don't know, Should i let go or hold on
Manmade money, money never made men

Another Happy day

Happy days are here again
Lets see what we can gain
And what shall we do in life
If we want to brightly survive
So first rule that we must adopt
Is to know bitter things we must drop
To purify our life from it
And fill with joy its every bit
And another thing that we must do
Is to look at things that are true
That contain in it nice things to show
Like the colors of the pretty rainbow
And all we have to do to try
Is to stop our tears and cease our cry
And then we'll see what we can gain
For happy days are here once again.

Beautiful is

How beautiful is the Belief, when we belief in the God
How beautiful are the Creatures, when we belief in the Creator
How beautiful is the Motherhood, when we belief in the Sacrifices
How beautiful is the Fatherhood, when we belief in the Battles
How beautiful is the Childhood, when we belief in the Innocence
How beautiful is the Dream, when we belief in the Ambition
How beautiful is the Contentment, when we belief in the Simplicity
How beautiful is the Life, when we belief in the dead
How beautiful is the Love, when we belief in the Care
How beautiful is the Happiness, when we belief in the Sadness
How beautiful is the Relationships, when we belief in the Tender
How beautiful is the Fruit, when we belief in the Farming
How beautiful is the Confidence, when we belief in Our self
How beautiful is the Beauty, when we belief in Our eyes
How beautiful is the World, when we belief in Peace
How beautiful is the Friendship, when we belief in Brotherhood
How beautiful is the Marriage, when we belief in Sharing
How beautiful is the World, when we belief in the Peace 

Saturday, March 03, 2012

Nature

Nature is mighty
Nature is strong
Nature is usually always right
Nature is rarely ever wrong
Nature is beauty
Nature is moody
Nature is smart
Nature always has the greater part
Nature is blue
Nature is green
Nature is every color possibly seen
Nature is true
Nature is beaming
Nature is dreaming
Nature is in every place
Nature is always with grace
Nature is true
Nature is you
Nature is me
Nature will forever be free.

Forgiveness

Forgiveness, a heartfelt decision.
The clearing of one's heart without remission.
A voice from deep within, contemplates, removal of festered thoughts of sin.
Forgiveness, allowing positive energy to prevail.
Wiping out all negativity along the trail.
Forcing out emotions of  darkness deep.
Keeping straight, a good nights sleep


Last day in Hospital,

All dressed up and no where to go.
would love to see a picture show.
Who cares! 
Who wants me? 
I'm old, cracked and crusted you see.
I no longer have smooth beautiful skin
instead, I'm wrinkled saggy, with a sloppy chin.
now hang to my knees, flat as can be.
What say you, when you look at me, 
awkward question my dear, 
Hmmm afraid to tell me.
Don't be afraid, my body speaks for itself.
You can roll me up and place me on a shelf

Jealous Love

Covered in blood 
I trudged along, 
feet sopping wet
I'll never forget.
Weakened
Determined, 
kept a slow pace.
Wearily 
Struggling, 
hoping for God's grace.
I need you now, 
more than ever
before, 
please help me make it
to that hospital door.

A friend


A friend is someone who stands by you through life's ups and downs.
Someone who wears no false armour or hidden crowns.
A friend cries with you during your saddest of hours, and rejoices when you reach your highest towers.
A friend will never cross the line with the one you love, but will have a listening ear, when you shed those tears.
A friend reaches out to shake your hand but touches your heart wherever you stand.

Only forty tears away

Whenever we loose someone through rejection, or as in death they depart, then we realize a heartache is only forty tears away. 
So, let me show you this,
Death is not the reason for the sorrow in my heart but each and every season the tears do impart. 

I carry with me, the pain of yesteryear, the pain that brings forth those forty tears.
Memories of you rest ..  heavy on my heart, not having you near me sweet ....... Name it, continues to 
tear me apart. 

You are a part of me, you are my genes, my blood. 
Without you in my life is like a blossom without a bud.
Let us not go to our graves with issues unspoken, and carry the pain of togetherness broken.
We must mend the seams and put together that precious mould. My God gave us each other in ... in trying times to hold.
I want to put all the pieces together and set the record straight, taking all negative forces and throw them out of the gate. Having you back in my life would return the missing link. Of that I'm certain ...... Oh here where are again .......... Name it, 

I also can think, on it to another forty years.
The time is here and now, please mend with me, forgive me if you really also can see. The bottom line is…..there is a woman in my thoughts, whose image is clear. This woman I miss tear after tear.
When the wind blows and the trees swish and even the hiss of a garden hose within the midst.I stand and ponder, oh yes, everybody knows. I do not keep a secret my friend, my love ...  still grows. 
People near and far away, people whom I treasure dear, I share my thoughts, my hopes, my fears, again here comes those forty tears. they all know of this precious sisterly love.
Today I'm sending this to you, I hope the meaning in my words clearly come through. I'm reaching out gently and calm, sweet, So, i think it's the time to throw all your fears.

Friday, March 02, 2012

Just like that



Once bird signed in grams white rose decided to admit her to love but rejected
I don't love you, she continued to admit her daily and finally
She has white rose when the color red will love you
One day, came flying off and publish his blood on the pterygoid rose it turned color to red, I realized how much I love it but rose jumper time was too late because the bird had died
Therefore, we must respect the feelings of the person who loves us and will remain an important days passed before loves us
To die

Thursday, March 01, 2012

With All my Senses


Love is a precious and most beautiful emotion, which flows like a rivers stream, through endless tunnels of hopes and dreams. A picturesque view of a sunset new capturing our hearts once stained with blue.
Love lives within our hearts and lingers within our soul, completing a body whole. Through valleys, hills and mountains high, love soars like an eagle as time goes by.
Love holds the key that opens the door revealing a brilliant star, shining on forever more.
True love builds a wall of protection, knocking down all barriers bearing revenge.
It lacks animosity and holds on to an infinite positive glow, presenting sensations of warmth soothing to the soul. Love is for everyone to have and to hold.
An intermingling of joy and happiness, a treasured new beginning, love plants the seed to end the pain of travesty's brought on by greed of materialistic gain.
Love is a remarkable desire to want all that is good for mankind. An act of endless forgiveness and kindness, Love harbours no grudge, nor cast a spell, nor causes the heart to sour or swell.
Like a giant tower, love is great and has much power, it provides a reason to live.
Love encompasses all humankind, a oneness sought so divine. Love gives kindness to beauty and beasts and it's compassion for the earth will never cease.
Love is like a quiet walk in the rain enjoying the scent of flowers in bloom. Love carries with it a stream of sensual passion, an intimate powerful connection and a strong desire to commit to work together as one.
Love can be seen in the eyes of our children, it can be viewed by the beauty that surrounds us and felt by the power of God. Love is the king of emotions and soars high within the realm of eternity. Love bears no hate and sheds no fear, it is a constant
reminder of what we hold dear, no more revenge, no more Vanity. Love more than any normality.

Never Regret


Love is something that doesnt always bring happiness, sometimes good times will come sometimes bad times will, but those in love are never left pining forever.
just take heart and live life to the full.
Life is changing in every direction every moment, life is a new shade, and life is a new sunshine. Every moment on earth live life to the fullest for tomorrow might never come.
Someone to love you with all his heart is difficult to come by, should their be someone like that? He or she is the one for you be sure.
His or her hand you most take, for all you know is tomorrow might never come. In the realm of your eyes, should someone get close to you? Try a million times to control the creasy heart but it shall continue to beat wildly. But think its over this is the moment, this legend might not exist tomorrow. 

Empty Life

When happiness is just a dream. In memory's distant past. And marriage just a fantasy, Which never seems to last.

When laughter is unheard of
And frowns replace a smile
When people live in silence
And friends go out of style
When love is an unknown word.
And hate the thriving passion
When peace is far behind us
And war the latest fashion
When all these things come to pass. And every word's a hidden knife. Then people are merely shadows, Just living an empty life




When being touched


Every day's one more chance
To enjoy life's lovely dance.
Sun beams are so far from bright.
While everything seems so right.
As I absorb the morning's view, 
No doubt it's all because of you.
At times when life turns awry, 
I want the world to pass me by.
Frustration tries to steal the day.
Suddenly appears a hopeful way.
My positives rejoice anew.
No doubt it's all because of you.
Money might bring more to life, 
Relieving momentary strive.
But treasure is already mine
Why the sun always will shine.
What more is there I could pursue? 
The world is mine because of you. 

Remember Me "Arabic P."


اذكريني كلما الفجر بدا ناشرا في الافق اعلام الضياء
يبعث الاطيار من اوكارها فتحييه بترديد الغناء 
قد سهرت الليل وحدي بين الامي وسهدي
وانجلى الصبح وهلا وانطوى الليل وولى
فتذكرت الذي كان رواحا حين افنيناه انساً ومراحا
وجرى دمعي من فرط حنيني فارحمني قلبي وحني واذكريني
اذكريني كلما الطير شدا مرسلا في الدوح الحان الصفاء
ينصت الزهر الى انغامه فيحيين ببشر وانحناء
قد ظللت اليوم أبكي من أذى دهري ومنك
وشدا الطير وغنى وتناجي وتهني
فتذكرت الذي طاف بسمعي إذمرجت الكأس في كفي بدمعي
وهفا قلبي من طول انيني 
فارحمي دمعي وحني واذكريني
اذكريني كلما الليل سجا 
باعثا في النفس ذكرى الأوفياء
يعرض الماضي ويجلو صفحة
أشرق الاخلاص فيها والولاء
قد سقيت الحب ودي ورعيت العمر عهدي
وبدا لي ما الاقي من تباريح الفراق
فتذكرت ليالينا المواضي بين شكوى وتجني وتراضي
واشتكت روحي من نار شجوني
فصليني بالتمني واذكريني

Days turned,


Days turned , days passed between separation and quarrel then I met her ,
I forgot , we were not speaking ,
I even forgot all nights I stayed awake
I forgot ,my hearts ,blame and perplexity
I don't know how I spoke to her ?
I don't know how I spoke to her
I cant be separated from my love..
Who else I have…. except her ,
I met her and her's eyes was longing
She said hello
,took my hand in her,
and whispered, she was mistaken ..
at once I forgot why we were separated ;
all the tears that I could not sleep from , for nights
were forgotten with one smile of her eyes
the most bitter torture
and the most beautiful torture
torture of love to lovers,
I can't be patient for one day when she is away ..
Patience needs patience itself ,
They described to me patience ,
I found it is nothing, but fantasy and words of love ;
words that are only said
where can I go from my heart
our beautiful nights are everywhere ..
We filled them with love
and filled the world with hope,
hope and love...
I pity all lovers
they are puzzled ,
they can't be patient ..
I can't be patient for one day ,
when she is far away ..
Dawn appeared after separation ,
with its rosy color
morning light woke up happiness
and said to love ,: come on , we will be happy ..
From happiness ……….
I was lost in happiness ,
From my happiness
I can't sleep or wake up!
and I found myself
living with you in a beautiful spring
between endless longing and longing that started.

Wednesday, February 29, 2012

Your Vanity


Be ye happy, if ye may, 
In the years that pass away.
Ye shall pass and be forgot, And your place that you got
Other generations rise,
With the same hope in their eyes
That in yours is kindled now, and the same light on their brow.
They shall see the selfsame sun
That your eyes now gaze upon,
They shall breathe the same sweet air,
And shall reck not who ye were.
Yet they too shall fade at last, In the twilight of the past
They and you alike shall be, lost from the world's memory.
Then, while yet ye breathe and live,  
Drink the cup that life can give.
Be ye happy, if ye may,
In the years that pass away,
Ere the golden bowl be broken,
Ere ye pass and leave no token,
Ere the silver cord be loosed,
Ere ye turn again to dust.
And shall this be all,' ye cry,
But to eat and drink and die?
If no more than this there be, Vanity of vanity!'
Yea, all things are vanity, And what else but vain are ye?
Ye who boast yourselves the kings, Over all created things.
Kings! whence came your right to reign?
Money, power, is that how you think
Yet for this, your one brief hour,
Wield your mockery of power.
Be ye happy, if ye may,
In the years that pass away. 

Vanity


Don't afraid miss' Shirley, i don't feel the pain
your words about my vanity can hardly hurt me now
you are still here, that was all i need to know
and you will keep me save
and you will keep me closed 
and rain, makes the flower grows
i can heal my wounds, with words of love
Just hold me kindly, and let it be
Shelter me, comfort me
you washed all my past, and you kept me save, and you kept me closed
i slept in your mind at least what a wonderful place
i breath away from the place you are, Now sky start to be clean at last
So, don't afraid miss' i don't feel the pain .. you here,  you have the sixth sense, that was all i need to know,
So, i rise the clarity flag, no vanity anymore.

Bribing the Nurse, Angle of death

2/29/2012, 11:03AM
Now i'm grateful by name and actions
to all the stuff, starting from my Doctors and ending with all angels, hiding myself again under the bed blanket otherwise it's still rain
Be happy that i have another day, To enjoy all your treasures and say,
"Thank You" to an Almighty who loves me so
That despite my frailties. I must know, my salvation is His concern…
So thank God with my actions in return.
Only then will eternal life
Ensure my happiness from earthly strife.
O my God, all patients have them angels of mercy, why i have this angel of death,
now i'll pretend asleep, just to let her disappear ..
Everyday one more chance appears, to enjoy life flower
nectar's, 
Sun beams are so far from bright, 

While everything seems so right.
.. I really start to be angry, Why she's keeping shout on my face, i thought later i can complete

When Spring Come.!!

Some people go looking for happiness. 
Some prefer power or beauty wealth and fame. 
Some crave intensity.
Some seek peace.
Some search for food and shelter. 
Some want to die with a good name. 
Everybody takes their lead from the way they came.
And everyone says they're looking for love though no one knows what it looks like.
They try to fit their thoughts to their words like skin they can touch that doesn't scar like the moon or shed like a petal too delicate for the senses but most just end up trying to mummify the mind stream .. by laying thousands of years of star maps down on troubled waters like autumn leaves, that don't know where they're going.
Eventually everything's swept away in the undertow of a dark ocean, that only smells sweet from a distance.
And longing shifts like infra-red into the blackness.
And bones on the moon are the only signs, nobody landed on Moon that life once perished here.
Orphic skulls whose jaws dropped like gates before their own gaping prophecies.
Time flows like a non-existent future into us and it fills us with a hunger
for everything we've lost or feel somehow was always missing.
One of the cardinal features of the emptiness we are conceived again and again out of is there's nothing behind its face you can fix like an identity to space.
For fourteen billion years the universe has been nothing but one long beginning must have an end, making everything up as it goes along out of nothing
like a man whistling down a long road .. far from home, late at night .. to let anything that might be listening in the darkness. know he's there so nothing can take him by surprise.
And every step he takes. he steps across a threshold like a star
just coming into being, whose light goes off in all directions looking for blind water it can turn into eyes.
Bosons hadrons leptons neutrinos wimps and quarks the deeper you look into the matter; the more you realize out to the furthest galaxy and beyond .. seeing is being and being is all fireflies.
And every one of them is true north of nowhere.
Some people follow their own beginnings like laws into the future, hoping to become someone else that doesn't recognize them anymore for who they were.
The peduncle's lost in the ensuing phylum.
Not because their future's rich but their past is always poor.
The planet doesn't spin on its axis for them.
It's hinged like a door that only opens one way though God face, that begins them like last year.
But the leaves of autumn aren't the laundered money of spring, because if our fulfilment weren't already behind us, we wouldn't be here trying to true the last to the first, of an unfinished multiverse like the best to the worst as if red were the past of blue.
Stop thinking birth is the past of death or spring is the future of winter as if they weren't the same breath and one breath of life weren't enough to keep the fireflies glowing in your ashes for eternity and everywhere you look you will flower like a vine; that divines its way to the wine by ripening the grapes of gratitude.
You will understand, for all that you have grasped and brought to fruition
I most exalted aspiration, is a heap of dead branches in the spring
burning like leaves of fire. still reaching out for the sun and you will hear the mind-mirror whisper to itself.
like the wind on far off waters
Narcissus is drowning in his own reflection like the flashback of a life he left unlived but everything is immersed in me .. like a mind
like a sea in a fish that ran aground on the uncharted land falls of its own teaching.
And the wine will flower in your mouth like a grail that's given up preaching
and finally found its own voice like a bird returning to a tree at nightfall to call out in its solitude, to the stars as they appear
we are here we are here we are here, where we belong at peace with everything we're missing
everything we long for
everything we are and are becoming
that overtakes us like music from within transforming ..
the silence into song
the water into wine
small beings into a big space
looking into the passing face of everything's that's mortal about us
with our eyes fixed upon the divine not to see it in any one place but with the presence of mind. to be wholly and impurely not that not this, without anywhere a trace of ultimacy in this world that we take for a sign, we are here we are here we are here and things are as they are not as they must be.
Nothing got here legally.
What's the expanding universe if not a refugee in its own country, somehow exiled from itself for reasons only it can express?
Citizen Universe
She should show me,
show me her true papers, her paintings
show me how we should dance on our own first Symphony
show me how i put our children to sleep
show me what her weep for, what her delight in, what her esteem, what her despise, what her ignore, what darkness of her, feeds that inferno of stars above her, burning its constellations like passports, that aren't going anywhere, show me the black mirror, that says you don't belong here, like some misplaced night of the full moon, not marked on any calendar
show me the law of being human in her life, that says this little poor thing, has one and this little poor thing, has none
show me where it's written; the guest shall turn strangers away from his host's generosity like a dog at the door that bares its teeth at the table
show me the home-made honey of her wisdom
show me the dead lamps, of the apocalyptic fireflies, that designed your chaotic cosmology by plagiarizing the light to prove the stars don't reserve a space in the universe, for any insight of her. Nothing got here legally.
No one followed a coyote or a law to cross the border into this insurgency of being. No one checked the colour of your eyes or profiled the light to see if they were fit for seeing.
You don't need a constitution to verify your liberty.
Well before you were born you were free and ever shall be to belong here as we all do.. to pursue what makes us
sad mad bad or happy
the way we all got here
the way we all get through
the way we're all alone here together with one another as we are with you,
as we are with her and him and me,
as we are with everything,
as we are with ourselves
when we don't know who we're becoming
when we don't know the stranger on the bridge watching the water flow that's waiting to greet us on the other side in the only way the unblighted heart of reality
we're all looking for like blood on a grail-quest for our humanity, accepts the darkness that seeks us out like a miraculous elixir of insight
so the kingdom won't fail
so the garden doesn't ask us for a green card to know and grow
in the only way we truly belong here
in the only way we know how to be
so the lifeboat we're all in .. like the same boundless mind, is always as full
as it is empty, so no one gets left out at sea
like a wave that couldn't be saved and no one gets in who doesn't know how to swim, the way we all got here .. and continue to be
all these thresholds of the sea that steps across us even as we move like waves
breaking discipline with our own continuum creatively.
Just to be there,
Just to crawl up on the shore of a new medium, like a refugee planting flowers
we brought from home hoping we'll still be there to watch them bloom.
i also accept the challange, but not to win or lose, in love both of the gamer will win, finally but not the End, i even do not know if the spring bloom attention was mine.
i'll never give up, even i can try until the last breath in my chest.





Hosp.. 3:00AM, under the bed blanket 

Tuesday, February 28, 2012

Bribing the nurse .. little pain

New Note 22
date, 2/28/2012 ... time, 20:58
After bribing the nurse with a box of chocolates, Just to bring my pc To the intensive care room where I'm lay down
A white bed, half dead and half wishing to heal from what i feel,
No one knew where I'm but my closed friends,
hiding the tears from me, while i saw them fall
encourage me to fight, my disappointed soul
That made my mind slide in a big hole
If everything happened to a reason, which one was that for.
Patients howling through the night,
Holding the bed pillow too tight,
I'm not afraid from death, it's just the chaos
here she is coming again, to tell me What i'll gain
in fact, outside it's rain, but inside .. too much pain
now i'm a case number 247, what's a ridiculous
Anyway i need to pray, i need to find determination way
Each one thought, money can bought anything
but, let me note,
Money can buying everything, but extra time to live, it's not.
i'm just grateful to whom, let me knew that;
the most three precious words in any language is,
"things always Changes"

Oh God, as much as you feel my pain, i really miss her deeply more.